Sugar and Pink

its my second week..

wahahaha.. its my first week under ulcer medication and its now my second week at st. scho.. masaya pala yung feeling na hindi nagmamadali.. tipong kahit 1 and a half hour yung class mo hindi mo namamalayan na lumilipas yung oras.. kasi ansarap na kahit ilang beses ka makipag kwentuhan lang sa prof ayus lang kasi may sense naman yung usapan at maayus naman yung class.. tas hindi pa nagmamadali yung utak mo. tipong kahit lumingon ka, pagtingin mo ulit sa blackboard yun parin ang pinaguusapan.. i may be back to 1. but im happy with my happy classmates…

haha.. feeling ko ang bata bata ko kasi puros younger sakin yung classmates ko.. Tas ang tawag sakin ate!! haha.. feeling ko andami kong kapatid.. medyo naninibago pa nga rin ako eh.. pero okay lang.. atleast masaya..

haha.. ewan.. kahit ang sakitin ko na, masaya naman ako.. irony of life.. *mwah*

jen: ..haha madaya ka..

di: di kaya mas madaya ka..

jen: panu ako naging madaya?

di: Kasi ur making me miss u m0re

jen: * melting *

di: Wag ka matunaw. La na mi jen. T.T

———

hai, the things that the one you love do to make you happy.. hehehe.. wala lang.. mukha na me love life ngayon.. xenxa na.. ganyan kasi kapag walang ibang magawa sa buhay.. joke.. hehe. kasi wala lang, since wala pa me pasok, siya lang naman talaga ang gumagawa ng araw ko, and beyond all that have happened for the past months, im glad that i have him all along to accompany me though my best and my hard times.. and kapag nga naman ganyan kalambing ang isang tao sayo? hindi ka ba lalong maiinlove? hehehe…

sa saturday na start ng classes ko.. well, its unofficial, kasi hindi pa ako enrolled, pero magaatend na daw ako ng orientation, kasi sa orientation pa naman talaga ng parents magiging formal ang enrollment ko.. up to now hindi ko padin minemention kung saan ako lilipat… basta, my close friends know that na.. and i know they’re gonna be happy for me.. i miss them so much.. lalu na si kuya alvin.. wala akong maconfidan ng mga nangyayari sa buhay ko ngayon, kundi itong blog tsaka yung notebook diary ko..

hai.. i need to prepare na for school.. i’ll get my uniform on the 13th.. wee.. back to wearing uniforms.. uh.. but that’s fine. atleast hindi ako magastos sa damit.. and we have a wash day naman eh.. so still happy.. gonna enroll din naman sa 13.. so  bahala na.. hehehe.. today is June 6, happy birthday kay Fran, Daryl, and "Kuya/Bear" Andre.. and after some time, birthday na ng isa sa mga baby ko.. weee. haha.. another debut sa Driveway.. actually, the last debut sa Driveway.. hehehe.. and we’re all grown-ups..

hai, i miss school.. and i miss my direktor…i miss my friends as well.. and in no matter of time, im on the road again, after a long and tiring stop over.. *kilig* ..

hai.. its been two weeks, and andito lang ako palagi sa bahay.. hanggang sa simbahan lang nakakaabot yung paa ko.. ayos talaga.. well.. im happy.. kahit stucked at home, this was the happiest moments of my life naman.. hehehe… biyayaan ka ba naman kasing dyos ng kakatuwang pinsan na kasama sa bahay, kotse na lilinisin, at boyfriend na pagkalmbing lambing… well ala lang.. yun ang nagpapasaya sa life ko now eh..

for the past two weeks, andito lang kami sa bahay ng pinsan ko.. ang redundant ko.. pero for that past two weeks ang dami na naming kalokohang nagagawa.. wala lang.. laugh trip kasi siyang kasama.. kaya hindi boring.. may kasama na ako magluto, magpahinga, laro gameboy, tulog, watch tv, sing along, and tell horror stories.. lahat na yata ginagawa namin together.. syempre pwera ligo, kasi iba kami cr.. hehehe.. am i supposed to be saying that?? hehehehe.. tas ayun..wala lang.. share..

may bago nadin kami car.. an automatic innova.. weee.. may car na me.. kaya nag aaral na me mag drive.. dahil sa fracture ng left knee ko.. di ako pwedeng mag drive ng manual.. buti nalang may naimbentong automatic.. at yey.. makakapag drive na ako in a little while, siguro kapag mas malakas na yung loob ko.. hehehehe…

tas, ang pinaka nagpapasaya sa akin for the past two weeks ay ang pinaka malambing kong boyfriend.. hehehe.. wala lang.. eversince this past month, naging todong sweet pa siya sa akin.. wala lang.. nakakapanghina ng tuhod kapag you know that someone out there loves you as much as he do to me.. parang wala nang sad moment kapag kausap ko siya.. hehehe.. and todo support pa siya sa lahat ng ginagawa ko.. kaya talagang happy together.. weee.

tas, anu pa ba? i got my new haircut na… and i got myself the brightest surprise for my bf.. surprise kaya i wont mention na.. hehehe.. tas anu pa ba?? i really miss my barkada na sa lasal.. ayun… hehehe.. happy days sa bahay.. and in no time, im gonna be back to school.. ola.. good day to everyone… enjoy the last bits of summer (if katulad ko kayong wala pang pasok..

well. well, what now.. there had been many happenings in my life. yep.. many.. awkward, awful, and great things that i shouldn’t be ashamed of.

so.. updates.. or let say this is how my blog for today started. and a little falsh back would do.. last year.. i had a very interesting year. after finally taking that step to moving on after arvin, i accidentally had hurt the feelings of my so close friend *a* because he was courting me, and it seemed like i busted him out of my life. well, i can’t blame him, he got struck by lightning when i was not in the mood for any romance. hindi ko naman kasalanan na nagsabay yung init ng ulo namin diba? tapos ayun.. i never had any class with him ever again.. we used to go to class together, schedule things together, and do a lot together. cry in each other’s arm, and laugh at each other’s mistake. but now, he doesn’t even want to look at me. as if i’ve done him well enough. not even a hi.. i want to apologize, and explain my side, but he refuses.. i guess he does refuse me.. so what now can i do? nakakainis talaga yang pag-ibig.. you know it’ll ruin everything, yet, you try and take the risk..

later that year, when we were approaching the christmas season, i found a new bunddle of friends. i’d say they’re great because they took care of me after me and *a* departed ways because of our issues.. now.. this group had a royalty in them.. well royalty as a name… let’s call him my prince charming.. (haha ang baduy ko.. )he seemed to care more for me than any others. and i always find him sweet.. and when i was avoiding the word love, i saw myself writing songs. damn.. i wrote more than 10 songs for this guy. and yet he doesn’t notice me.. darn… actually.. hindi ko alam if nahahalata niya ako.. pero ang manhid niya if hindi.. but anyways, ayun.. i guess he was the sweetest friend i got.. he made my heart jump just when i sit beside him.. and maybe he urged a fight between us so that i could let go of him.. and when it hit me, i started drinking.. WOW.. i know na how to drink hard liquor.. not just beer.. as in yung minimix nila na liquor.. i had to fill myself with alak para makalimutan ko na ang reason kung bakit hindi kami pwede ng aking prince charming ay dahil taken na siya. DAMN.. he is taken.. OUCH..

but then, that’s where i saw that things will go more bright for me.. when i was on the brink onto falling into peices, here comes my knight in shining armor to rescue me.. he was sweet, yeah.. but my mind wasn’t off my prince charming.. but then again, i started to keep my mind of him, and started to focus on my knight in shining armor, that when i was so so drunk, i said that i was beginning to like him.. FINE.. wrong move.. dapat hindi ako yung nauna.. dapat hindi ako yung nagsabi.. dapat hindi ako lasing. but i guess, for me, that was the smoothest move i’ve done, cause we started dating afterwards.. wee.. yihee.. i dunno.. he said he liked me the first time he saw me sitting beside my prince charming. he thought he (prince charming) was my boyfriend so he didn’t approach, and when i told him that prince charming was just a crush, he felt to himself that he had no hope on me. but when i said i likde him, everything’s changes.. WOW.. that’s what i call turning your world UPSIDE DOWN..

after a while, he was starting to court me.. we had a little argument cause of my shout out that hurt his feelings, but we were able to fix that one.. and realizing that we had that ^thing^ for each other, he gave me that very surprising new year’s resolution on my birthday.. my 18th birthday!!!.. is that a sign or what.. but he asked me, on the staircase "would you be my girlfriend?" … aw.. i like that.. and now he is my boofwend.. anjo.. like my name. joan.. he was my ninth, yeah.. but he was the second among all to ask me the question sincerely from the heart.. and yeah.. the staircase was significant.. weird, but the guy with whom i have loved for years also proposed to me at what seemd to be stairs - which we call bleachers. i am not comparing okay.. just stating facts.. and today, is me and my boyfriend’s 4th monthsary. wee.. and we’re still counting..

i dont really know if it was a mere blessing in disguise, yep, my boofwend is  blessing, but i guess some of the facts above aren’t.. but still.. im happy.. most especially in the arms of my lover..

"The best part of being in love is when you just love a person and be happy about it. Even that person can never be yours, even if you know that it wouldn’t last forever. That’s the true essence of love. It’s not about winning someone, its not being happy because you know you’ve loved someone. It’s about being guiltless because you know you didn’t take away someone from anybody. You just love and love unselfishly."

well i dunno exactly what to write.. actually, i dont know what to say.. i dont remember well when i last wrote a blog.. and i just feel like writing cause i really miss everyone.. my week long vacation seems likes a year… and i miss everyone.. really.. i miss my friends.. and i miss my best of the best friends.. i just can’t explain exactly why.. but i do.. hmmmmn..

" a sweet truth… when GOD knows you’re ready for responsibility of commitment,He’ll reveal the right person under the right circumstances."

Wala lang.. Ang ganda ng gising ko ngayung umaga. Kahit na sobrang bitin ng tulog ko. As usual hindi ko nanaman alm kung ano yung mga napanaginipan ko.. Basta kelangan ko intindihin yung buong araw. May practical ako, may matatangap na test. Magrereview para sa finals. Bakit ganun. Parang ang dami-dami kong kelangan gawin? Kasi next week finals na namin. Tas this week may pasok padin. Anu kaya yun… >.< Holy week na may pasok pa… Feel ko tuloy nagtratrabaho na ako.. hehehe.. pero ayus lang… Masaya kasi gumising sa umaga lalu na kung may rason ka para gumising.. Minsan, kahit pa gaano kabigat yung araw mo, mapapangiti ka nalang bigla diba? ako, araw-araw ganun.. Kahit na napaka hassle na ng week na ito.. May time parin para tumawa, ngumiti, at matuwa sa nangyayari sa paligid ko. hehehe.. Napaka-thankful ko. Kasi ginawa ako ni Lord na isang napakamasayahing tao. At may ginawa din si Lord na isang tao na makakapagpapasaya sa akin araw-araw. Antagal ko din hinantay yun. Yung isang tao na kapag yinakap mo parang biglang mawawala lahat ng problemamo, at ang maiisip mo nalang is the happy times you have and you spend with that person. Parang there’s no sad moment. Kahit magaway pa kayo. By the end of the day, andyan parin kayo para sa isa’ty isa. i dunno if he’s the one meant to be with me. Pero hanggat andayan siya, masaya ako. And hanggat andyan siya, palagi parin akong ngingiti, mananaginip, mangangarap, hihiling, at maniniwala, na sana siya na nga.. …

"Perhaps love will show us the way.. "

-jen 04/03/07